“Who says I can’t be free?
From all of the things I used to be,
Rewrite my history,
Who says I can’t be free?”

- John Mayer, “Who Says”

There’s no need to think we can’t change everything in our lives in a heartbeat. Think back to when you were a kid with grand plans to become a doctor or firefighter or even the president. The possibilities seemed endless and we didn’t spend our time being pragmatic about our dreams. Recapture that innocence. The world is what we make of it, in more ways than most people understand.

All that matters is this moment; just because you have a history of getting angry quickly or gossiping doesn’t mean you always will. Start the positive change now. Take life moment by moment, choose your own actions, and be the person you’ve always wanted to be. Thinking you can’t change who you are means that you are living in the past and allowing it to dictate your future. Since neither past nor future exist, what you are really doing is keeping yourself out of the present moment, which is all there really is. Do what you want to do and be who you want to be. Make today the day you rewrite your history and truly become free.

Change and impermanence are everywhere present, both in nature and throughout our material world of structure and technology. But nowhere is the ebb and flow of change more intimately felt than in our relationships with friends, family and co-workers, where we find even the most enduring connections can transform in sudden and unexpected ways. Our closest bonds are our most important anchors in life and often provide the lens through which we see not only ourselves, but, to a large extent, the world around us. The mirror held before us through these relationships is most often the truest and clearest and, if we dare look deeply enough, provides an instrument of amazing growth and transformation. When close ties are broken, whether through the transition of death or a simple parting of paths, this same reflection illuminates the way to understanding and acceptance, even while coping with the sting of impermanence.

After the loss of the presence of a dear friend several months ago, I have gazed into this reflected pool on a daily basis and have been given profound insights into the many facets of myself, both light and dark. While challenging, the process unerringly cleared my vision, allowing me to see the underlying elements of our friendship and the roles we played with, and for, each other. While the change is not one I would have consciously chosen, I now embrace a fuller, richer view and have come to a peaceful resolution within myself.

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A Buddhist monk once told me: “All I have learned in the twenty years that I have been a monk I can sum up in one sentence: All that arises passes away. This I know.” What he meant, of course, was this: I have learned to offer no resistance to what is; I have learned to allow the present moment to be and to accept the impermanent nature of all things and conditions. Thus I have found peace.”
-Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now

From time to time we may find ourselves thinking about “the good ol’ days” wishing we could return to the past, when everything was better. Of course, that usually isn’t actually the case since we have a tendency to gloss over anything we didn’t like, but that’s not the point of the above passage. Rather, the point is things never stay the same, and that should bring great comfort. It does not matter what it is, something always changes, be it the people, the place, or even simply our perceptions.

The sooner we realize this, that change is a ubiquitous reality that affects everything, the sooner we can come to terms with this moment. And that’s all that we ever really have, is this moment. Senior Year of high school, complete with football games to attend, freshmen to haze, and a general feeling of invincibility will never come back. (Some of you are thinking, “Thank God.”) That brand new car you bought will never look as good as it did on the lot and never smell as good, either. Embrace this.  Don’t spend time wishing for the good ol’ days to return, live them!

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